MY WIFE IS DONE beating up on traitor Democrats like Biden and Kennedy. She will leave those losers right where they belong with the other frothing rabid dogs. My wife wants to give a beating where the beating belongs. She wants to beat the bushes now, in particular Bush George. She says if he were our son, she would tell him he is one bad son of a bitch. I am no sure how to tell her what that makes her.
SHUT UP she says. Shut up, you bitches. I am pretty sure she spiked the eggnog after she found out the New York Times spiked this spy on citizen story for a whole year. When she heard about all the right and righteous ones on the right who want to put the Times on a spike for treason, I think she downed a whole bottle of Jim Beam while I was working what is left of my upper body at the home gym. The Times has a past it should have lived up to sooner, rather than later, my wife said.
SHUT UP you bitches, she said with some relish. We know treason and have seen it before. I know it was alcohol I was smelling on her breath as she finished up the last of her toast and the editorial in the Washington Post. I enjoyed that brief moment of silence before the damn broke loose. The torrent started to rip Bush’s way.
SHUT UP she says. Shut up, you bitches. I am pretty sure the minister might notice something other than angel’s breath this morning when my angel takes the sacrament. It’s beats the devil out of me how I am going to make her stop her stammering about beating the hell out of that son of a bitch Bush. Don’t you see it’s all related, she yells as she puts on her yellow coat. I am going to drive us now to the meeting house if she doesn’t drive me crazy first. I hope she doesn’t start up about the lawyers. She would say by by to Bybee in a minute.SHUT UP she says. Shut up, you bitches. You is a bitch, I heard her say. Rarely am I the one to suffer her attack. And her grammar seemed lost, if only for a moment. My wife collected what I thought was the lost parts of her mind. Then she said. Not you. Yoo, John Yoo is a bitch. I hoped she would be done by the time we got to church, because I was sure all the congregants would hear her and possibly god in high heaven. Yoo is in trouble and I'm glad it's not me.
SHUT UP she says. Shut up, you bitches. Things got more graphic as she stuck her head out the car window. She suggested a solution to the problem which might work for her, but not for me. My wife said we should take all these lawyers who tell Bush breaking the law is all right and we should shove them all up Bush's ass. My wife said that would shut up those bitches for good and might give Bush pause from running his mouth as well. My darling who smiles rarely went quiet, then gave me the oddest grin.
THEN SHE TURNED ON ME and asked me where is Osama? I didn't want to be the one to tell her the reason he hasn't been found.
If you liked the original post on why the spying defense was wrong, check out the follow-up. Maviva has tried to defend it by saying it qualifies for section (2) of the FISA act in question becase the insurgents could be considered elements of a foreign nation. Nice defense. Well, then I guess the Geneva Conventions apply to them, don't they?
This gets better and better as they squirm on the hook.
Posted by: Jazz | December 18, 2005 at 03:05 PM
Dude, you can turn out a prose poem with the best of 'em.
Funny, I want some eggnog and a Sunday sleep-in.
Posted by: Tata | December 20, 2005 at 11:56 AM