PAST TIME FOR SURE
SOON IT WILL BE over. Our national pastime and all this Fitzmas will mercifully (or not so mercifully) end. Certain conclusions are inevitable. Crimes have been committed and errors have been made. The Astros look like they are Lost in Space in this World Series.
THE NATIONAL League has now lost seven games in a row in the last stanza of our Fall National Song that bids summer goodby. The only thing worse than the Astros in the World Series has been has been Liz Phair singing America the Beautiful.
THE HERETIK KNOWS this nation will have healed completely when that song is not wedged like a square hole in the round hole of the game that takes place on a diamond.
QUESTION: Should the National League be disbanded? Should Liz Phair retire and let only professional hacks like the great Irish tenor Ronan Tynan take their swings and misses at America the Beautiful? And all this talk of Fitzmas? We are anxious for our presents regarding the pas. Fitzmas was funny the first seventeen million times. Heh.Heh. And what about heh? Oy.
GET RID of heh and have more imagination. And Fitzmas needs some refreshing. No one has suggested National Wag the Dog and Pony Show Is Over Day, probably for good reason. We need something the secular types can rally around before Fitzmas goes before the Supreme Court. Jed suggests Fitzakuhh. The Heretik likes Fitztavus. Can’t somebody please come up with something new? Your thoughts? Your rant? Your link?UPDATE: Norbizness is tired of a few other words as well. This version of McKRAP TM is in some ways the diablolical spawn of this woman.
If the Nat'l League were disbanded my Dodgers would have to rest on their memory of 1988 (it could be worse, of course, but still...).
As to the Astros, well...
Posted by: Linkmeister | October 26, 2005 at 06:46 PM
Bush's Ashes? (Weak, but Fitzgerald is an Irish name, after all.)
Posted by: Linkmeister | October 26, 2005 at 06:47 PM
I agree with Linkmeister all signs point to an Irishman and that means he is a Christmas guy. Although, you know what happens when one assumes! Thanks for the link, btw!
Posted by: catherine | October 26, 2005 at 07:21 PM
Yeah, the NL's pitiful. How many World Series have they won lately? The Marlins in 2003 against...the Yankees. And the Diamondbacks in 2001 against, who again?
Oh yeah. The Yankees.
Hmmm...
Maybe if we're talking about disbanding losers...
Posted by: Lance Mannion | October 26, 2005 at 07:26 PM
I imagine the loser Yankees will have to settle for 26 World Series titles and go home crying. Again. *sniff*
Posted by: The Heretik | October 26, 2005 at 07:30 PM
By the way, this is one of those very weird World Series for me when I'm rooting for American League team. But I have to say the Astros have not been terrible. They've played pretty well. The White Sox have played better. Rob Farley's right, this may be the most exciting four game sweep in Series history. Although, the score's tied at the moment, 0-0 in the 4th. Still a chance for a fifth game and the Rocket could come through to force a sixth.
Posted by: Lance Mannion | October 26, 2005 at 07:42 PM
1. I love "Fitzmukkah"
2. I agree with you, Lance -- every game has been extremely close. This could NOT be called a blow-out. I still think that it has been an extremely entertaining series.
3. The Mets suck.
Posted by: Matt | October 26, 2005 at 07:44 PM
If the blinkin' Astros could hit with RISP this Series would be at least 2-1 in their favor, I think.
Posted by: Linkmeister | October 26, 2005 at 08:00 PM
Baseball is the perfect game for blogging. It really lends itself to multi-tasking. Golf is good too, but sometimes there's just too much action. And boy, I agree with you, H., that Liz Phair bit was pretty ugly. Luckily I had the mute button on so I just went blind for a little bit and then I was OK again. I keep the mute button on all the time when Joe Buck and Tim McCarver are announcing. Otherwise I'd have to shoot the damn TV.
Posted by: Neil Shakespeare | October 26, 2005 at 08:25 PM
Fitzaa?
I'm sorry to disagree, but the 'stros have not sucked. It is agonizing for Houstonians like me to see them lose (well, not yet tonight) by not coming through with hits in the tight spots, but every game has been close enough to be interesting. I think people are getting their money's worth; I just wish the Series would last a little longer. The Series, not the individual games; oh, no, no, no...
Posted by: Steve Bates | October 26, 2005 at 08:31 PM
A second vote for Fitzmukkah.
Dr. Pepper went into a fit during the Phair "performance," and I had to turn the telly off.
Posted by: Pepper | October 26, 2005 at 08:33 PM
Hetitik- thanks for your comment about Cheneymammon.
I have a new poem, for you to examine about the indictment.
Fitzmas is weak and Fitzmukkah is problematic..
Try Fitzball- come to my blog, scroll down to the post "what will Fiztgerald call." and you will so why we think it works.
Posted by: Gotham Image | October 27, 2005 at 12:05 AM
Heretik- sorry for the misspelling above...
Posted by: Gotham Image | October 27, 2005 at 12:06 AM